and Sometimes Your Heart Just Breaks For Your Children

I looked out my front door this morning overlooking our neighbors property and saw a enormous manufactured home being delivered to them. I couldn't help but watch her reaction as she watched the men pull in with her home, her hands were held to her mouth, and I imagined she had tears of joy running down her cheeks. Our neighbors and their two kids have also been living in a camper for the last 10 months! So her joy must have been overwhelming as she watched the men working to steady her new home.
I decided to call the kids to the door, thinking they would think it cool to watch these trucks deliver an enormous house! But the minute I heard all their squeals of excitement; I knew I had made a stupid mistake! "Eeeeeeck, mama, mama, is that our house!!!???" I wanted nothing more than to have a control in my hand so I could rewind my stupid moment. I went on to explain that this was Brodie's house and we were glad that they were getting a new house. With disappointment and question in the girl's voice they asked when they would be getting a new house. I told them someday we would; that we will have to keep praying. But Trey, (bless his little heart) at 2 was not so easy to convince. In his little toddler talk he proceeded to argue with me, "No Trey's house!" I would reply, "No sweetheart, its Brodie's house." "NO, Trey's house!" This went on every time he would look out the window. All that I was finally able to do was give him a silent smile of love. It broke my heart, and I had to leave the room a couple of times so the children wouldn't see the tears that threatened to slide down my cheeks.
Through the many stuggles that we still have as a family I have one hope and He is my un-ending strength! I must continue to be satisfied in what I have and trust Him for what I do not have! I will also pass this lesson on to my children and God will give me strength to live it before them! "But now they desire a better, that is, a heavenly country. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for He has prepared a city for them." Heb. 11:16

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